My, it really has been a while since I last posted, and to be honest, I haven't really thought about this blog much. I used to, but i guess being worried about getting a job, and with school, everything has been busy for me.
I just wanted to say hi, and hope everyone who reads this blog is doing well; I sometimes read other pro-ana blogs, and if the reader hasn't written anything in a long time, I start to wonder if they are doing okay. There was one I used to read all the time, but they haven't posted in a long while; so, i just wanted to write that I'm okay. I unfortunately haven't lost any weight, Im still about 124, but being in a city where there are so many thin people, and WAY more gyms, and fitness programs than a small town, I'm sure the pounds will come off really soon. I've started a program called 'The Birthday Project', which entails that by July 19, my 21st birthday, I will have lost about 15-20 pounds, so that when I wear a dress and go out for dinner, all eyes will be on me, and NOT because i'm the fattest, but because I'm happy. Hopefully.
There are rules that I've made up, but at the moment, i can't remember where Ive out them. Nonetheless, the idea still stands: look fabulous by my birthday.
About a week ago, my dad, who was telling me to have questions about the movers - since I had hired movers to move the big things, as I'm moving to another apartment at the moment, and one with no roommate, just myself!!!!! - , I told him that I didn't have any yet, and he said, 'Nicole would've done this by now."
Now, i know that my parents, in their minds, compare me to my sister, but they have never said it out loud. This is the actual first time that anyone has said to my face, that my sister is better, and comparing me to her.
I'm not exactly sure to how comprehend this. Thinking of a way to punish myself, but we all know, Im not that good with rules.
Till next time,
Love,
Em
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